Most of us had to actually learn to drink. I like to think I was a quick study, but even the most intrepid of us (whew, got it right) usually have to practice to be able to drink without gagging and choking. After decades of practice I can now do tequila shots (mini ones) relatively gracefully; my trick is take all of that energy jolt and direct it down through my arm so that I can slam, slam my hand down on the bar, and maybe give the most feminine of yelps. After all these years I still get confused sometimes and forget the sequence -- lime, tequila, salt? salt, lime, tequila? Sometimes I have to do several before I get it right: salt, tequila, lime (I think). Anyway, it ends up just perfect.
That said, for the non-drinkers out there, I'm sorry, it's too late. Don't even try. You'll just look silly, and there are so many better ways to look silly. Trust me on this, as I recently took up hula hooping and know whereof I speak. And, if you're wondering how to spell it, hula or hoola, to those in the inner circle (get it??), it's just hooping.
Many years ago I worked as a breakfast cook in a Friendly's (a mid-Atlantic chain that probably doesn't exist any longer (note to self: Google this)). I was a college student as were most of my co-workers, but the woman who worked with me from 6:00 to 10:00 a.m. was what we called a townie, older than me by about a decade, tough as nails, and not too fond of us spoiled college brats. She knew how to cook breakfast and work a counter, and didn't give out advice easily. I felt honored one morning when she suggested I try Shout on my apron stains, and I knew I'd won her over (I worked hard) when she sidled up to me one morning at the grill as I was about to mangle some eggs (again), took the spatula out of my hand, slid it under the over-easies, flipped them, and said "don't be afraid of your yolks". Intrepid. That was some of the best advice I ever got, and I'm telling you this now because just this morning it hit me: don't be afraid of the hoop.
As for the limoncello, baby, that stuff scares me! I open the freezer door, stare it down, and close the door. Once I brought it out of the freezer and it got as far as a bar stool that lives in the middle of the kitchen, and I just circled it ... slowly ... put it back.
See how it seems to loom large?
and larger????
Now, whooooo's hooping??
8 comments:
Friendly's DOES still exist! My mom always takes us there when we visit New Jersey. OK, I won't take up drinking, and it's been too long since I last hooped, so I probably shouldn't do that either. The limoncello looks rather intimidating to me, but I love it's yellow, lemony color. My lips sorta purse together just thinking about all that lemon.
oh no, you must hoop. i've made about ten hoops so far, and surely one is perfect for you. seek and find your inner hooper ...
it is ever limonchillooming how magnificent it looks!!
lemonchillooming - YES
I'm so glad you are back and entertaining me and everyone else.
OK- I'm missing your blogs- where are you??? :) When I'm up late like this, I expect you to entertain me with your wit and wisdom!
JANET!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Who's hooping you say? We are, or should i say my wife is and i tried it once. i have no hips you see, and that gives the advantage to the distaff side of the marriage. Her hoop actually folds up into a tight little bundle so it fits into her backpack. Who knew about that? Sorta like tent poles with the bungee cord in the center. Works like a charm, and she packs it up and heads into the woods to practice where no one can see her doing it. She's a bit shy about the thing, but more and more she is willing to show the neighbors how kool it is, now that she's getting pretty good at it. Around here the hoop has yet to shed its 50's image. Matter of fact, we don't know anyone in the entire town who's doing it. That could change, and if i lose some weight and get my hips back, i just might try it again. p.s., love your blog. signed, your not so long lost cousin.
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